Ridiculous Rumors..

I had lunch with a media owner on Fri who is now a good friend and I heard from her the most ridiculous rumor about me and also I considered the most vicious one...

That I am having a lesbian relationship with someone I hired and used to work with me just because I am close to the people who work with me.

I was shocked beyond words and simply cannot fathom how someone can spread such unfounded rumors.

1. this person does not know me at all for if he/she knows, surely he/she must know I am one of the most motherly figures in my industry(and this comes from my many friends and associates who know me. Not forgeting the fact that I am married now for 13 years with two lovely children)

2. this person is simply quite ignorant and in his/her ignorance has turned vicious

3. God protected His children from harm

On hindsight I am extremely thankful this rumor did not get to me while I was working in my previous company. Now that I have left and my 'supposedly' subodinate is now working in another company with a lot less contact, this rumor is dispelled automatically.

Despite my sinful nature, I will pray for God to bless and me to forgive this person for surely, he/she does not know what he/she is doing...

What happens when Christians are not positive and joyful.....

Today I read an article from TGIF(Today God is First) that says God's people should be the most positive, joyful people on earth. This joy should be a by-product of a healthy, intimate relationship with Jesus.

What happens when you are not positive? Does it mean you don't have a healthy and intimate relationship with God? I struggled with this bit because the truth is that I have been stuck in a rather down rut lately which I find it very hard to get out of the depressed mode...

But I don't think I have an unhealthy relationship with GOd but rather it is a spiritual attack by the devil...It is at times such as these that I turn to the Bible most to try and find an answer or a soothing word hoping that some verse will just leap out at you and tell you this is the answer you have been looking for. Psalms are my favorite as it contains some of the most inpiring wise quotes and observations by the writers.

I think the worst scenario is that no matter what you do be it scriptures reading, praying, you still can't seem to be lifted out of the dark cloud that have overcasted you..and refuse to go away.

That's the situation I am in now...i feel bad just by feeling bad and negative...nothing seems rite..everything seems bleak...and this is coming from a Christian who is trying her best to live by God's rules seems just so cruel and unimaginable...

Bible study in my humble abode

It's been 6 years since a bible study has been conducted in my place. It's the first in my not so new place whom I've moved in 6yrs ago. it's funny but i do remembered that when we moved to our current place, i told my hubby that we shd go to church more often rather than just the sabbath services and also BS groups...6 years on and now we are only starting to see the zeal for God slowly creeping back into our lives...

It's such a wonderful feeling. i feel God's presence when we prayed and discussed the bible and ponder upon the teaching Christ has for us as we all gathered together on a common ground, not only for knowledge but also for communion with each other.

When I first decided to rejoin BS, I remembered the anxiety my hubby has. I think for both of us, whom i don't think are considered the fervent kinds, he's worried of making a fool of himself if he's asked to attempt questions. My 'motives' are purely that to get to know fellow brethren better aka 'networking'. I mean, if i can go to a working function striking up conversations with complete strangers, sure i can do better with people i see at church but normally, don't know them and embarrassingly, know them but don't know their names.

we attended our first BS on 1st july and i must say that we have since benefit tremendously from such study groups. i remembered when i first left my old job, one of the main reasons is to have more time for God. one of the things i wished i had done more is to attend more church services and outings and of course BS groups. i remembered in one of my prayers i asked God how i can serve Him. And I asked Him to bless me with church sisters whom i can turn to. for someone like me who is not born-ed in the church, i always struggled to try and fit in. and sometimes, i wish i can have some best friends and i don't know why but it's so difficult to strike a common ground.

maybe it's part me and part true, but the close knitted relationship from a small congregation like ours, i think there are rooms for improvement in helping people who become members fit better. maybe something like an outreach group. anyways, from my prayers and God answering my prayers, i finally understood what it means in James 4:3. so often when we pray, it is in worldly context and we do not get what we prayed for because it is not what God wants us to pray. For me, my often failing has been for God to vindicate me when i meet with obstacles in work, blah blah blah...so mundane, so small but to me, it seems so important. But I am thankful that at least now, i know God's glory and His blessings and love are so abundantly rich if only we knew what are the right things to ask of him.

have i grown in my knowledge of Him? Boldly, i say I do! and I hope to know more and have a closer walk and relationship with my dear Heavenly Father.

language seasoning commonly used by people in these days

i'm on my 2nd week in my new work place and given such high education level among locals as well as foreigners, i am really surprised at the lack of vocabulary still...

my point is that vulgarity is so commonly used that some days i go home with a 'ringing' tone in my ears after all the verbal abuse*eyes roll*

they are not directed at me as per se but rather people's langauge are peppered with 'f#%@' and the likes. I cringe everytime these words are uttered. Do we really need to season our sentences with these words? I think not. And the sad fact is that so many people spent so much money on education and all they are good and creative at using are different variations of 'f#%@', it's sad...

this is tentamount to the Bible's prediction of the end times...

Sometimes I wish we are still living in the times of the Jane Austen novels. Everyone is so civil and polite with such expansive vocabulary and that to me is absolutely fasinating

Are Christians meant to be doormats in this cruel world?

Finally, the weekend is here. As I write, Sabbath is already over and I can't help but feel a little sad and apprehensive as Monday draws closer, which means I am into my 2nd week at my new job.

This week has been eventful. Starting a new job, my dad getting his op, a dear church brother getting married on Nat Day's Eve(which coincidentally, is my 13th wedding anniversary) and lastly, REU outing in Jurong Bird Park, where the family had fun and importantly, communion with fellow brethens. I truly enjoy it. Getting to know fellow church members and their family. You get to see another side of them, the fun side.

I started my fasting prayer after dinner last night. My new job doesn't bode well. What I thought I was hired to do has now changed quite drastically, and I am very displeased about the arrangements. Again, I draw comfort from the words of Paul the disciple in the book of Phil 4. Rejoice always, Paul advises. Somehow, I need to keep reminding myself that my dear beloved heavenly Father surely has His reasons and plans why I am put in this place.

It's funny how jubilation at the onset of a new job can now suddenly turned into such a turmoil. I always have this question in my mind. Are christians meant to be stepped all over and be doormats to unbelieving gentiles? Just because we are to emulate all the good characteristics of Jesus Christ, does it make it right for us to be bullied? Is it wrong to assert our rights and speak our mind and refuse what are wrong and down right blatant exploitation? I'm confused sometimes....

I find it hard to know when is the right time to take it lying down knowing that God will revenge me and when it's right to stand up and just give it back to people who are out to bully you...does other christians share similar grievances as I do?

I started my fasting prayer after dinner last night and well into this afternoon. I wanted to draw close to God and His blessings and words of wisdom when I speak my mind to my new boss on Mon. It's likely I may lose my job but I have to stop doubting and start believing that God is with me. It's timely that today during sermon, Pr Chin AQ spoke about what Jesus said in Luke 8:50 - Do not be afraid; only believe..

I shall not cower in worry nor fear. I will be bold in His name

My dad has been discharged from the hospital today

Thank you all for your incessant prayers! My dad has finally been discharged from the hospital. THis is the best wedding anniversary gift from God as incidentally today is my 13th wedding anniversary.

I ask that you continue to keep my dad in prayers. It is my hope that he will come to know and accept the Lord soon.

Shalom!

rojak mix of good and bad happenings

2nd day at work. Remind me again why I am working in the corporate? Ah yes. Money...the root of all evil.

&#^$#$ I am still feeling a lot of detachment from working vs being a homemaker. To make it worst, my hard disk crashed and all my work from the past 5 years gathered in my previous company is completely wasted. The devil is out to get me. I am sure of it.

I wanna cry when this happens in the morning. I kept praying. I asked God for a miracle. I told God that since you can save my children a few weeks back, you can save me too and this is a matter of life and death! I know I am silly. GOd didn't save my hard disk. It's officially DEAD.

But there is always a ray of light even when the clouds are so dark. Thank God I still have friends in my ex company who have very kindly agreed to help me extract info again. Am I commiting a white collar crime? I think so but then again, those works do belong to me. I created them. So it's a thin line, really. I don't know if God will punish me for this. Somehow I have a feeling He will not because, I think He gave me this solution.

Things are looking a bit up in my new work. My hostile ex colleague/friend spoke to me(finally!) and I have a meeting to go tomorrow. I have never been so happy to go for a meeting! That's only because I hated tweedling my thumbs more. I wanna deliver an honest day's work to God and be accountable to my fellow colleagues and I cannot comprehend how people can skive their whole life taking their salary, not delivering work and do not feel a tinge of embarrasement and guilt. I can't. And I am pleased with myself because I think this makes me a better person and also importantly, delivering what God expects me to.

And finally, the best thing that has happen is my dad is recovering well! I told him to praise the Lord! He must by now acknowledges that God has shown His grace and mercy. How can he not be touched? I am. I know it is God's works. Just last nite I prayed for God to take away my worries. It is too much to take. I ask Him to love me. Sayang me. Help me. Strengthen me. And He has. I love you, God!! Thank you. Even with the corrupted hard disk, you have helped me thru today. Glory to Your name!